The Sideline Mom

BFF's forever.

I have a BFF.  I do.  Her name is Stephanie. Or Stephie, Steph, Steph-a-rama, or whatever I feel like calling her at the moment. She's awesome. She lives in Ohio.  And she is coming tomorrow to visit.

I have known Stephanie her for well over 25 years. 25 years!  Holy Moly! That's nearly twice as old as we presently are. Kinda.

Here we are acting like typical besties. We were 17 years old. Can you stand the love?! Didn't think so.

We use to get into all sorts of mischief. We did really. 

But first let me start out by saying that although we lived only about five or six miles down the road from one another it took us both making a trek for spring break trip all the way to Florida for us to run into each other and actually meet. 

Then the story kinda goes in the direction that my group of girlfriends and her group of girlfriends met up at their hotel to hang out. Her and I ended up talking the entire night non-stop for hours and then my girls stayed over at her girls hotel cause it was to late and to far to walk back to our hotel and then something about Steph letting us sleep in her bed while she slept on the floor and then while she was sleeping someone pulled out one drawer from the hotel room chest of drawers and left it so that it was approximately two inches from her nose and upon her waking the next morning she started to pound the bottom of the drawer yelling "I'm in a coffin, I'm in a coffin" and I decided she was my Best Friend Forever. Yes, that is pretty much how it started. I'll never forget it. Never. It was the beginning of a beautiful friendship. 

 

After that day you would rarely if ever see us apart. Well, except when we were at school of course because we went to separate schools which was a real bummer because then I had to wait nearly seven hours everyday monday through friday before I could break all traffic laws speeding to her house (which again was only about 6 miles away) so that I could hang out with her and eat her mom's homemade dinners (and entire cans of giant black olives) which were both delicious. Then we would spend countless hours in her "flamingo" bedroom (with a nice collection of ceramic clown masks on the wall) talking about everything from how neurotic I was at the present moment to planning out our no-fail strategy in getting her to win the next Miss Ohio pageant she was in.  It was the ultimate. Or at least that's what we thought at the time. 

 

The years we've known each other really do seem endless as do the stories. There are so very many stories.

There's the one where at senior graduation she got a convertible red mustang and it was sitting in the parking lot with a big bow on it and she walked out of the ceremony and said "Wow look at that car. Someone must have got that for graduation" And we were all like "Yea, Steph it's your graduation present" and she all like "No it's not, you guys are idiots". And we were all like "ummm.. yep pretty sure it's yours Steffy and if you don't get in the dang thing and take us for drive we're leaving" Add then she was all like" Holy cow are you serious" and then we got in but she couldn't drive us around cause it was stick-shift and she couldn't drive a stick shift yet.

Then there was that one time when she finally did in fact learn to drive that car and we were driving down the road with top down singing "Red, Red Wine" by Bob Marley at the top of our lungs and we passed this lady walking down the road wearing a paper bag on her head like it was a long, tall top hat. And we were puzzled beyond all recognition from that moment on. I'm not sure either of us knows exactly what that whole encounter meant at all.

Then there is the time were were both in each others weddings. It was the right thing to do. I think.

Then we got pregnant with our first children about the same time. I was due about five months before her and shortly after Austin was born I went to visit. Austin was about four months old at the time. It was  February and blistering cold in Ohio. We were at her mom's house and something exploded underneath the kitchen sink creating horrible fumes. Not knowing yet what the substance was we decided to get the baby and Steph (very pregnant at the time)  out of the house. Steph quickly waddled her pregnant body out to warm up her SUV concerned about the pungent fumes. When I thought it was warm enough I strapped Austin's baby carrier into the back. From there I'm not sure what happened. But next thing I know Steph had locked Austin in the car with it running. Heater was on full blast.  Luckily the baby was sleeping. Stephanie's Dad (dear sweetheart of a man) is trying hard to get the car unlocked. Next thing I know we had to call the fire department and get him out. While we were waiting Stephanie said I became very, very quiet for a very long time and she said she didn't know if I was contemplating busting out the window or killing her. (I wasn't thinking either, I just thought "boy I'm glad newborns sleep a lot) But I liked the fact she thought I was contemplating killing her. Not really. 

I have a billion other stories of Steph and I, they are just for another time. I don't have any more time to tell them all now. I have to clean house. She's coming to stay. Actually she's a photographer and  is coming to shoot a wedding. I'm assisting. Yee haw!! Should be a fun time. 

A story is bound to come of it all. When the two of us get together there is no telling what may happen. But I'll let you know. 

Over and out

The (giddy like a school-girl) Sideline Mom

"It is one of the blessings of old friends the you can afford to be stupid with them." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

"The more we love our friends, the less we flatter them: it is by excusing nothing that pure love shows itself." -Moliere

Summer is here!

And we have most of our time planned out. It will be filled with skateboarding, skateboarding oh and more skateboarding.  It's just how my boys roll. No pun intended, seriously.

In all honestly the month of June is laced with nothing but skateboarding events. Every single weekend. I'm thinking of buying a board for myself. Hey, it's great exercise and I'll be at the skate parks anyway and ok, who in the heck am I kidding... I am not ever going to skateboard. Ever. But it's fun to watch my boys do it. So that's my plan. Watch and encourage. It's what all Sideline Mom's do.  Right? We watch and encourage.

So, although sending a child out onto a concrete surface to stand and ride on a board that roll's super fast with nothing but a few little postage stamp size pads between them and the ground and cheering them on to do so sound's a little oxymoron-ish,  it's what I'm gonna do. That's how I roll.  I encourage my kids in the things they love even if it means possible injury. 

So here we come summer! We are ready.

For a little of this

 

and this

 

and some of this. Hopefully without the underwear showing.

 

And possibly more of this.

 

A more of this with no hip injury's.

And  this.

 

And a whole lot of this. Fun! Fun and more fun.

Isn't that what summer and skateboarding is all about anyway?

That's what I thought.

Here's to a great summer for all!

Over and out!

The (loading up on sunscreen) Sidelinemom

Moving in the right direction

On Mother's Day after my boys and I made ourselves somewhat presentable we headed downtown to check things out. We had not really viewed our city firsthand since the flooding happened just weeks ago. 

This is what we call the batman building in downtown Nashville. And that would be a crack in my windshield. It's been there since the beginning of time. And yes, I need to get it fixed but I don't have time. I'm too busy running around to skateparks all the time for crying out loud.

 

We cautiously drove down to the river. We didn't really know how far we could go, but we wanted to see what we could see.  Lot's of other people had the same idea we did. We hopped out of the car to take a look.

The river had gone down quite a bit from when it had crested during the flood at what I believe was 54 feet. (Not sure on that exactly) But the water was still rather high for normal.

The city looked beautiful. It looked normal, but indeed we know that it is not. And will not be for a while. But we for sure, thanks to the help of many are moving in the right direction.

Moving forward and happy to see the water had receeded at least this much. That for sure is helpful.

It was hard to fathom that where the boys are standing in this picture was just recently completely submerged. The dry sludge on the steps still visible. I told them not to touch anything even the handrails. To much bacteria to imagine. I'm a germ-a-phobe like that.

But the water is down the healing in progress and we are grateful. 

We love our city. Really we do.

  

So much to love and be happy about in the city of ours

I can seet he SunTrust building where I worked for a company who helps other companies go public. It was fun and the perfect job for me. I got to do the shopping. Yee haw!

I can also see Mere Bulles where I have listened to many a wonderful band in my 20 plus years here as Tennessean.

And see there?! That would be the wonderful Wildhorse Saloon. I've line-danced to the Boot Scoot Boogie there to many times to count.  I have.  Oh yes indeed. And I'm proud it.

This is a new piece of artwork on the side of the riverbank. I love the red. The water nearly covered half of it.

My boys trekked around quite a lot. It's how they roll. 

They are glad they're city it getting better. The destruction was scary to see. But something they will remember all they're lives.

They are good southern boys. Both born and being raised in Tennessee. I like that. I like that alot. It's a good steady, grounded place to be rooted.  Did that make sense? Especially if and when they do sprout they're wings they decide to up and fly off to HollyWood and become big movie stars or take up residence on the beach somewhere so they can surf and skateboard for the rest of they're lives. (which they talk about daily)  They will always have Nashville to come home to. I really do love that.

And here would be our beloved Titans stadium. Where those huge football players (and our little player Mo-at least he did once here) take the field to play the "big game" during football season. It was also filled with water. Up to the ninth row of seats. But the water is gone. Repairs being made. We again are grateful. 

Grateful that the people of our city with heads held high are making it through one of the most devastating events in it's history. Grateful for the Volunteer spirit. Grateful that here we help not hinder each other. Grateful we have been a part of it. 

 It was good on Mothers Day to go down and see this with my boys.

Then once we realized we were starving we went at ate.

We    ate    lots.

Like this. Shrimp . Oh yeah baby.

 

And this. Because who in they're right mind could resist this? Not me!

 
 

But best of all. I go to be with these guys. And this place as I have said before is my very favorite place to be.

 
 

Oh yeah!!

Over and out.

The (there are now words to show my level of gratitude at this moment) Sideline Mom

   
   

Randomosity

My sister.

She has returned home safe and sound from a  three week work trip to India.

I am relieved beyond words. Really. I have none, other than to say... I am so glad she is home. (oh and I wonder what in the heck she brought me) hee hee

Austin is healing nicely with his broken hip and all. No pain. This week would be the final week before his check-up x-ray where he will find out if he can get back out there and skate like he was born to do.

It's been a long one to say the least. Thank God it's nearly over.

Morgan and baseball.

The kid, to put it plain and simple is just a great little athlete. Even at eight years of age.  I  am really happy for him.

He will, as they say put himself out there for the ball. He works hard. Make's great play's one of which this season was a double play where as short stop he got the out at second base then threw to first for the double. A play that was actually complemented  by the opposing team's coach as a play he has never witnessed at this age level. And he has coached this age group four years strait. Morgan works hard.

And he really love's to do well. Want's to do well. Want's to make the plays. Like's to please the coaches. And his Dad. Who is actually one of them. And truly strives to do all of this and more. And for the most part is successful. Which again is amazing for his age and size. 

I personally love watching his effort and heart out there on the field. It is inspiring to say the least. I love it all. All things baseball. Except for one thing. If he does not make a play he is screamed at for the error. And loudly. By the very coaches he is trying so hard to please. It's difficult to watch. He is clearly discouraged when this happens. And is quickly losing interest in the game because of it. As he has said recently "It's just not as fun anymore". And is that not what little league baseball is about? Fun. 

 As his mother I know him better than anyone and I know exactly what he is feeling when he is screamed at for attempting to do something he so want's to achieve yet falls short of. He's discouraged.

Here's the question. Do coaches have to scream to coach? Some say it's necessary. Is it screaming actually necessary for the kids to learn how to play the game? Can they not think of more creative ways to teach the boys than just yelling commands?

I know there are baseball coaches that read this blog regularly and I was just curious about your take on the subject and would greatly appreciate any input.

And as I mentioned, my child is eight years old.

During our past few games it has actually gotten worse. Lot's of raised eyebrows from the bleachers. But no one says anything. Except me. During "close" games it seems especially overpowering. One mother even went so far as to somewhat defend the screaming by saying "Well, they do compliment them also".

So my next question is this,  does the fact that they compliment when the child does well make right the screaming they endure during an error? 

I just want Morgan to want to continue to play. I want all kid's to continue to want to play for that matter. It's the very reason why I take so many picture's of the team and give them out at season's end. I want to encourage the kids to play again. For them to see themselves. For them to witness themselves in action. To point out all that they do well in hope's that they will be eager to play again next season. 

My little Mo is not so eager. He's likes the game. Not the yelling. 

Here's hoping it all improves.

Over and out.

The  SLM

  

Because you loved me.

My mom.

 

I always thought it a little corny when I would hear someone say a particular song reminded them of someone or when one would use song lyrics to explain how they felt about someone. I did. I understand this is weird and all on my part. But me, Sonja Chandler, the picture snapping , pastry loving, overly enthusiastic Sideline mom is in fact weird. Beyond weird actually. I always have been. Heck, I was even fired for being weird once but I won't go into that right now. It's ok. I've come to terms with my abundant weirdness. But I did in fact think it odd to use a song in this particular way. Until the day I lost my mom.

Then nearly every song on the planet reminded me of her.

The sound of Silence by Simon and Garfunkle, Just to see you smile-Tim McGraw (my mom had the best smile on the planet - really she did). You raise me up- Josh Groban, The Earth Song-Michael Jackson, Even the Walrus by the Beatles (told you I was weird)  she loved the Beatles.

But no song got me more than Celines Dion's song Because you loved me. Because in all honestly and all kidding aside my mother's love was monumental in my life and in the life of so many others simple because she loved so deeply. For me the lyrics just can't be ignored for that exact reason.. the love 

She loved me from my very first breath to her very last.  

Showed me my first Christmas with more love than one baby could comprehend at the time. But I felt it. 

She loved me despite the fact that I picked my nose for quick family photos's. Although if she would have known I think she would have lovingly told me to stop picking my nose. Geez! !  

And because of her love I learned to love back.

 I loved and adored her in every possible way. And looked up to her more than she would ever really know. (not sure if she loved my dad's tie here - but it's possible she did)

She was the definition of love to her family. And she thought my Dad looked like Pat Boone. (just thought I should throw that in)

And she loved to have fun.

 Even though I would make fun of her. She loved me anyway.  

She loved being with me and quite honestly was my best friend in my adult years.

She loved me like no friend I've ever known since.

And when you thought she couldn't love anymore. She was blessed with grandchildren and her love was more abundant than ever.

Her capacity to love was more than many could understand.  

But I guess that's what mom's do. They love. 

So this Mother's Day I say thank you to all the mom's who love. Who love, love, love and then love some more. Who love us through all the akward, gross, annoying, frustrating and weird phases of our lives.

"I'm everything I am because you loved me"

Over and Out

The (abundantly loved by the best mother on planet earth) Sideline Mom

   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Celine Dion Lyrics - Because you loved me.

"For all those times you stood by me, For all the truth that you made me see. For all the joy you brought to my life, For all the wrong that you made right.

For every dream you made come true, for all the love I found in you, I'll be forever thankful.

Your the one that held me up, never let me fall. Your the one who saw me though, through it all.

You were my strength when I was weak. You were my voice when I couldn't speak. You were my eyes when I couldnt see. You saw the best there was in me.

Lifted me up when I couldn't reach. Gave me faith cause you believed. I'm everything I am because you loved me.

You gave me wings and made me fly. You touched my hand I could touch the sky. i lost my faith you gave it back to me. You said no star was out of reach.

You stood by me and I stood tall. I had your love I had it all. I'm grateful for each day you gave me.

Maybe I don't know that much , but I know this much is true. I blessed because I was loved by you.

You were always there for me, the tender wind that carried me. Light in the dark shining your love into my life. You've been my inspiration, through the lies you were the truth. My world is a better place because of you.

I'm everything I am.... because you loved me.

 
 

Submerged.

At this very moment one week ago it started to rain here in middle Tennessee. It did not stop. For nearly 36 hours strait.

This was not a sprinkle. Nor a drizzle. In fact it never sprinkled or drizzled. This was a downpour of epic proportions in every single way. I kept thinking I had never witnessed it rain this hard for such a long period of time without it ceasing. Or at least without some small break in the storm. This never stopped.  While the skies continued to dump it's nearly 15 inches of water on our beloved city, many of the area's low lying  creeks began to rise and basements began to fill.  Then report's started to roll in showing area's not even considered to be in danger of flooding, swelled beyond human comprehension.

To say this in the least dramatic of ways, we were frightened out of our ever loving minds.. 

But despite our fears and desire for it to cease the downpour continued. Road's began to close, flash flood and tornado warnings flashed across our TV screens and  most of our city's hustle and bustle came to a sudden stop. More new's reports showed car's, trucks, and SUV's submerged on major interstates.  And the major streets we drive down numerous times a day were unrecognizable. Then came the stories of people being swept away by the overwhelming water's current's.  People losing their lives while venturing out on what they thought, what we all thought to be a typical saturday family outing. Unbelieveable!

By sunday afternoon this is what we were dealing with. Here below is our local YMCA skate park. The one we visit nearly every single day of the week. And the parking lot in which I park my car while I watch my boys skate nearly every day of the week.

Totally submerged. The skate ramps gone. Those objects in the water are cars in what use to be the YMCA parking lot completely underwater.

The boys were in tears. Honestly.

 

Behind the skate park there are soccer fields which now more closely resemble a lake. The bleacher's where I sit for hours on end while watching my guys fly down ramps are no longer visible.

That black shed to the left is the employee shack. More than half-way full of water. The park fence in the back has collapsed due to the weight of the water and debris.

  

And the brand new half pipe (to the right here) where the boys were skating in just 8 hours before this terrential downpour started.

This is the field near our baseball park where kids play pick-up games of football and Lacrosse. Unbelieveable.

 

Too much water with no where to go.

 

We were all devastated. Although grateful that we personally did not suffer any damage of our own  our hearts ached for those less fortunate. Those who were stuck in their homes with no way out. Those who lost every single thing they had ever owned in their entire lives. Those whose have missing family member's and can not find them. And most in particular those that personally watched family members be swept away by the waters never to return.  We are hurting with you. We really truly we are.

How does one move on?  How does one pick up the pieces and go forward and move away from the single largest disaster to hit Middle Tennessee since the Civil War?

Not exactly sure but most likely one volunteer at at time. It's what we do. It's how we do things here. There is not a way to explain it. It just is. With the best of the best people this country has. And this city, one of the best if not the best this side of the Mississippi and beyond for that matter.

Home of Country Music USA.  Best music the world has to offer. Home of The Grand Ol'   Opry,  George Jones, Dolly Parton, Hank William's Sr and Jr., Waylon and Willie and the boys. Brad Paisley, Taylor Swift, Little Jimmy Dickens. The Tennessee Titans, Nashville Predators, The Opryland Hotel and the Goo Goo Cluster. (if you've never had one you are missing out) 

Also not sure exactly how all of it will get done but it will. We as they say "git er done". We are the Volunteer state. People of Middle Tennessee don't want something for nothing. They just show up and give their all. 

As the saying goes.

It's

how

we

roll.

Don't worry about us. Pray for us but don't worry. We are on our way back. Better than ever. Without a doubt.

Go Nashville!

Love you. Mean it!

The Sideline Mom